I’ll make it personal for me. A friend of mine had twin boys a few years back. When the twins were about 2 years old one of the toddlers somehow got out the front door and walked behind my friend’s car as he was backing up, accidentally killing his son. As a community our church grieved with this family.
Now, a very real question I ask myself is what is the relationship between that accident and God’s sovereignty, God’s love, God’s action (or lack thereof)? I don’t feel comfortable telling my friend that it was God’s providence. If God can somehow arrange for my rent check to not bounce, why on Earth couldn’t he have arranged for this young boy to be spotted before he was struck? I would have gladly given up my “miracle” for one that would have spared him. Did God have some “greater good” that required this accident? I know my friend, a counselor, has been able to have a positive impact on people’s lives because he has been able to share in their grief in a way others would not. Was that worth losing his son? I don’t think so. Maybe it’s not our place to know what greater good could come from it? Maybe, but then how can we really say “God is good”?
So here’s where, differently than my Calvinist/Reformed brothers and sisters, I think perhaps that God has self-limited his own control over humanity and perhaps the universe. Arminian theologian Roger Olson puts it this way (see here and here): God is in charge, but not in control. By this he means:
God limits Godself and allows things to happen that are not according to his “master plan” (antecedent will) and the reason is to allow real free will in the world.
Other theologians further along these lines are Greg Boyd and Tom Oord, who wrote a book a few years back called The Uncontrolling Love of God: An Open and Relational Account of Providence. Greg and Tom are open theists, and while I don’t think I would go that far, I certainly can understand why people are attracted to that position.
In my mind, this makes more sense of what happened to my friend. I still don’t know what it means about my rent check, or whether God cares if the Chiefs go to the Super Bowl (had to slip it in there). It does seem to me to make more sense of things like tragedy, war, and an origin of life that evolved rather than “poofed” into existence. I don’t really know, and of course I believe God is “big enough” to do anything, but it’s those hard, seemingly senseless, heart-breaking tragedies that honestly make me wonder about how he chooses to act.
Sorry if none of this was helpful, but this is an area I struggle with. I see in Jesus God’s goodness and love, I see in life so much destruction and pain. How am I to put those together? My faith has taught me to say, with John in Revelation 22, “Come, Lord Jesus!”, but I still struggle with how to help those in the midst of evil and tragedy. No easy answers…